learning internet friends’ real names is always surprisingly disappointing
like what do you mean your real name is “luis” not “thunderfuck mcpickuptruck”
there is no one expecting dick to taste good though. i’ve never ever once met a cis dude paranoid about his genitals tasting weird or salty or sweaty or whatever. but of course pussy has to taste like fruit and whatever. OF COURSE.
doctor: are u sexually active
me: *opens wallet to reveal pictures of all my anime boyfriends*
how dare you think about people who aren’t me